I cannot afford the cost of preschool, nor do I want to pay that amound when I am home anyway. At the same time, Bryce needs some help! I fear for when he starts school. I fear he is going to be "THAT" child. I fear that we will LIVE in the principals office! I think he will do okay at first. It will be new, he will be out of the house and around friends, he will get that kindergarten leniancy - that leniancy that does not last long and goes straight into trouble. We have hit that wall this year since Isaac started school.
I feel as though I have tried EVERYTHING with Bryce. I thought Caleb was stubborn and strong-willed. WOW!! Bryce takes it to a whole new level ( a scarey level). I was told yesterday by someone ( and I have said something similar before), that they were saving for college for one of their kids and bail money for the other. That is how I feel. I have said before that if he is not in jail by the time he is six, it will be a miracle.
He lies, he steals (from his parents and siblings - nothing in public YET), he throws temper tantrums. There is no punishment that we have found that works. If anything, it makes it worse. If I tell him to go to his room or time out he says no. If I PUT him in his room or time out he comes out. The only way I can keep him in his room is to sit there and hold the door closed - which is kind of hard to do with three or four other kids running around! He would rather have a few minutes of enjoying what he wants to do and getting a punishment than not doing it at all.
This morning we had a talk. I know this has gotten so much worse lately because of Daddy being gone. It is all the time, but so much worse when Daddy isn't here. We are nearing the end of the fourth month of this. There has just been a lot going on and he is having a hard time expressing his emotions.
We have come to an agreement (until he gets bored with it). I asked him this morning if he wanted to start a behavior chart. I explained what it was and that we would set a goal to work towards. This does not work the same for Bryce as it does for a lot of kids. Bryce wants instant gratification. If I tell him he has to wait a whole week or month to see any kind of reward, he will quickly quit. So, this is our plan.
We went and got this:
It has lots of magnets for responsibilities, rewards, etc. on the back of the board:
Right now his responsibilities are: get dressed, clean room, share, no whining, no hitting, be nice, get ready for nap/bed and go to nap/bed. As he masters these, we will replace them with others, but the are the worst eight right now. We are going to make a treasure chest (to make it more exciting for him, I am going to go to Hobby Lobby and get a wooden treasure chest and let HIM decorate it), Everyday, if he has had a good day and filled that days chart, he will get to get a prize from the treasure chest. He will get to help me get stuff to put in the treasure chest, so he will know there is stuff he wants and likes in it. At the beginning of each week we will set a weekly goal (this weeks is that he wants to play my DS, so if he fills the chart this week - he gets 30 minutes with my DS - which he normally steals!). This will be something like us doing what he wants to do or extra one on one time, things like that. At the beginning of each month we will set a bigger monthly goal. This will be something like a new toy or game or going to the movies, etc.
So far he is REALLY excited about this plan. I know it has only been a couple of hours, but things that normally cause him to break down - he has gladly accepted and moved past. For example, yesterday morning he asked if he could get donuts for breakfast. I told him no, he threw a fit. I told him he would not get them all week - the fit grew much worse. This morning, he asked for donuts again. I reminded him of what happened yesterday and explained why he could not have donuts this week. He did not throw a fit. He went and started playing.
It has been a very calm couple of hours! At this point - I will take all I can get!
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