Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Divide and Conquer and First Swim Meet
Life has been so crazy lately. For the first time, we (as in Paul and I) are really having to take a divide and conquer approach to our evenings! Between swim, golf, Beta meetings, volunteering, dinner, five kids and homework for three - our evenings are CRAZY!! A typical afternoon would be something like I get the little two up from nap around 2:30. Caleb gets off the bus at 2:50. I drop Caleb off at the Library around 3ish, on the way to pick up Bryce and Isaac from school. After they are picked up I pick Caleb up around 3:45 and have him to swim by 4. If it is a non-golf night, we hang out at swim until practice is over around 5:10. If it is a golf night we drop Caleb off, take Isaac home to do homework and change and take him to golf. Hopefully in that time Dad is back with Caleb (who he picks up on his way home from work) and he stays with everyone else while I take Isaac to golf. We get home between 7:30 and 8 and Isaac eats dinner and finishes homework . Somewhere between all of that we do practice test for three for spelling, vocabulary and whatever test they have, listen to two read and do any other homework the three have. The crockpot has been well used the last couple of weeks for dinner!
I watched Isaac play a short game in golf last week. He really impressed me with how well he did! He knows what club to grab for where he is at on the course, pretty good at judging how hard to hit and is able to make the ball go to the green. It was nice to see him having so much fun doing it, too.
Caleb has had one swim meet so far. It was basically just a meet to get times for all of the kids. They are placed in heats against other kids around the same time as them so it is a little bit more fair (these are 6th through 8th grade kids competing together). He is his worst critic and came home quite upset that he finished in "last place". We explained that he is competing against himself more than anyone else and as long as his time is getting faster at each meet than he is doing well. We also told him that most of the kids have pools at home and swim regularly and have for most of their lives - unlike him. He was in a bad mood most of the night, but it made him work harder and listen more at practices, so it was probably a good thing.
His coaches have told him several times (and me) that he is, by far, the most improved student on the team. He has a friend on the team that has a pool. The kids dad has invited Caleb over several times to practice and he actually gets in and works with him. I can't wait until his next meet (this Friday) to see what progress he has made!
Here are some pictures from his first meet. I tried to show them to him the night of the meet to cheer him up. He, instead, got more upset because he was looking at the pictures and telling me what he was doing wrong (I wasn't breathing to the side, etc). I told him that it was great that he could recognize mistakes and that will help him see what he is doing wrong so he can fix them.
I watched Isaac play a short game in golf last week. He really impressed me with how well he did! He knows what club to grab for where he is at on the course, pretty good at judging how hard to hit and is able to make the ball go to the green. It was nice to see him having so much fun doing it, too.
Caleb has had one swim meet so far. It was basically just a meet to get times for all of the kids. They are placed in heats against other kids around the same time as them so it is a little bit more fair (these are 6th through 8th grade kids competing together). He is his worst critic and came home quite upset that he finished in "last place". We explained that he is competing against himself more than anyone else and as long as his time is getting faster at each meet than he is doing well. We also told him that most of the kids have pools at home and swim regularly and have for most of their lives - unlike him. He was in a bad mood most of the night, but it made him work harder and listen more at practices, so it was probably a good thing.
His coaches have told him several times (and me) that he is, by far, the most improved student on the team. He has a friend on the team that has a pool. The kids dad has invited Caleb over several times to practice and he actually gets in and works with him. I can't wait until his next meet (this Friday) to see what progress he has made!
Here are some pictures from his first meet. I tried to show them to him the night of the meet to cheer him up. He, instead, got more upset because he was looking at the pictures and telling me what he was doing wrong (I wasn't breathing to the side, etc). I told him that it was great that he could recognize mistakes and that will help him see what he is doing wrong so he can fix them.
Wednesday, September 08, 2010
Hiking with the Family
We went on a family hike a couple of weekends ago. We used to go all the time in Arkansas, but it is so hot and humid in the summer the last thing I want to do is go hike! We were blessed with a few days of lower temperatures, and more importantly low humidity (so it actually felt like lower temperatures), so we decided it would be a great day to hike.
On our hikes the boys like to point out everything they see. Just in case someone is with us can't see the big log in the middle of the trail, or the massive rock you have to get around! This time there were lots of "Hey, Mom. Take a picture of this!" So, here is our hike in pictures. We saw.....
spiders that had webs over the trail. I am pretty sure they were trying to catch hikers to eat!
lots of different mushrooms
crazy roots and vines
ummm.....well there were lots of boy-type theories
teepees
snakes
flowers
but MY favorite things to see were my family
looking at who knows what
Someone wants their PawPaw. Out of all the signs on the trail (there are signs all throughout naming different plants) this is the ONLY sign she stopped at and she would not leave!
hiking together
Looking over the bridge
running together
sitting together
walking through the meadow
her curls :)
walking up the stairs on the trail
The Princess Seat
On our hikes the boys like to point out everything they see. Just in case someone is with us can't see the big log in the middle of the trail, or the massive rock you have to get around! This time there were lots of "Hey, Mom. Take a picture of this!" So, here is our hike in pictures. We saw.....
spiders that had webs over the trail. I am pretty sure they were trying to catch hikers to eat!
lots of different mushrooms
crazy roots and vines
ummm.....well there were lots of boy-type theories
teepees
snakes
flowers
but MY favorite things to see were my family
looking at who knows what
Someone wants their PawPaw. Out of all the signs on the trail (there are signs all throughout naming different plants) this is the ONLY sign she stopped at and she would not leave!
hiking together
Looking over the bridge
running together
sitting together
walking through the meadow
her curls :)
walking up the stairs on the trail
The Princess Seat
Smart Discipline
As you can imagine, discipline with this many kids is a must! It is also very challanging to find something that works for everyone. The last several weeks we have been trying a discipline plan that was recommended to me. I have been told it works for EVERYONE! As of now, I am a believer.
It is called Smart Discipline by Larry Koenig. Basically, you make out a list of rules. Each child has a daily or weekly chart. They get so many "free" squares a day or week and then they start losing privelages. On each chart you right a rule that the child needs to pay specific attention too (while still following all of the other rules) and you rwrite something positive that they did the day before.
We started out with daily charts for all of the boys. They had three free squares (three chances to do something wrong before they start losing privelages). In each of the other five squares you write a privelage. If that square gets x'd they lose the privelage for that day.
Here are the problems we found with this chart:
1. the boys were rushing through homework or saying they didn't have homework (then getting up the next morning and trying to do their homework before school) so they could have their privelages.
2. Everytime I would tell Andrew he was getting an X, he would cheer. It did not matter how many times I would explain it, he thought a x was a good thing!
So, after a week we had to reevaluate how we did things. We went to the weekly chart. They get 7 free chances for the week and there are five privelages listed.
After pleading many times with the boys and refusing to help with homework in the mornings and telling Caleb if he didn't study I would expect him to come home with a 100 for EVERY. SINGLE. GRADE. in school (which he found TOTALLY unfair and said my expectations were TOO HIGH), I had had enough! Since, ALL of the kids were rushing through or saying they didn't have homework we took away all weekday privelages. I told them that from the time they got home (which is about 5:30 by the time we do swim) until bedtime they were not allowed to do anything but homework (stopping for dinner of course).
THIS finally got their attention, especially when they realized I was serious! Now, the privelages that they chance losing are their weekend privelages! This weekend was the first weekend to lose weekend privelages and they had all lost some! It was hard on all of us. Paul and I would have to remember that certain kids couldn't watch tv or go outside and who could. And let me tell you..they TRIED to get us to forget! For once, no one tattled "so and so isn't supposed to be watching tv because they lost that privelage." The charts ARE NOT mentioned by the kids!!
The charts are hanging up in the kitchen. If I X someones box, I write why it got the X. Then they do not have to question me as to why they got it. As they are learning this is being taken very seriously, they are getting less and less X's.
I had given up on the chart with Andrew for a while, because it just didn't seem like he was getting it. Then I heard him fighting with Caleb and he said "I am going to tell Mom to give you a X because you are being bad!"
His chart went back up RIGHT then! I am obviously a little easier on him because he is still learning the rules. Also, the book says to start them at age 4 with these charts and he is only 3.
The best thing is that this is supposed to cut down on a lot of the lecturing. And it has. Now I just say "You are getting an X because....." and they say "yes maam". Sometimes it is with some attitude, but they do not backtalk (they learned real quick that would earn them another X)!
This weekend (when he was not allowed to do many of his weekend privelages) Caleb asked me to go back to the daily charts. I asked why and he said because he never lost privelages when they were doing daily charts (which is good since they are at school all day). Then he asked me if he could earn back his privelages, which I said no. THAT is when I KNEW I had found a winner discipline plan! They recognize that they have to do their part to get what they want. They also realize this is something we are sticking with :)
It is called Smart Discipline by Larry Koenig. Basically, you make out a list of rules. Each child has a daily or weekly chart. They get so many "free" squares a day or week and then they start losing privelages. On each chart you right a rule that the child needs to pay specific attention too (while still following all of the other rules) and you rwrite something positive that they did the day before.
We started out with daily charts for all of the boys. They had three free squares (three chances to do something wrong before they start losing privelages). In each of the other five squares you write a privelage. If that square gets x'd they lose the privelage for that day.
Here are the problems we found with this chart:
1. the boys were rushing through homework or saying they didn't have homework (then getting up the next morning and trying to do their homework before school) so they could have their privelages.
2. Everytime I would tell Andrew he was getting an X, he would cheer. It did not matter how many times I would explain it, he thought a x was a good thing!
So, after a week we had to reevaluate how we did things. We went to the weekly chart. They get 7 free chances for the week and there are five privelages listed.
After pleading many times with the boys and refusing to help with homework in the mornings and telling Caleb if he didn't study I would expect him to come home with a 100 for EVERY. SINGLE. GRADE. in school (which he found TOTALLY unfair and said my expectations were TOO HIGH), I had had enough! Since, ALL of the kids were rushing through or saying they didn't have homework we took away all weekday privelages. I told them that from the time they got home (which is about 5:30 by the time we do swim) until bedtime they were not allowed to do anything but homework (stopping for dinner of course).
THIS finally got their attention, especially when they realized I was serious! Now, the privelages that they chance losing are their weekend privelages! This weekend was the first weekend to lose weekend privelages and they had all lost some! It was hard on all of us. Paul and I would have to remember that certain kids couldn't watch tv or go outside and who could. And let me tell you..they TRIED to get us to forget! For once, no one tattled "so and so isn't supposed to be watching tv because they lost that privelage." The charts ARE NOT mentioned by the kids!!
The charts are hanging up in the kitchen. If I X someones box, I write why it got the X. Then they do not have to question me as to why they got it. As they are learning this is being taken very seriously, they are getting less and less X's.
I had given up on the chart with Andrew for a while, because it just didn't seem like he was getting it. Then I heard him fighting with Caleb and he said "I am going to tell Mom to give you a X because you are being bad!"
His chart went back up RIGHT then! I am obviously a little easier on him because he is still learning the rules. Also, the book says to start them at age 4 with these charts and he is only 3.
The best thing is that this is supposed to cut down on a lot of the lecturing. And it has. Now I just say "You are getting an X because....." and they say "yes maam". Sometimes it is with some attitude, but they do not backtalk (they learned real quick that would earn them another X)!
This weekend (when he was not allowed to do many of his weekend privelages) Caleb asked me to go back to the daily charts. I asked why and he said because he never lost privelages when they were doing daily charts (which is good since they are at school all day). Then he asked me if he could earn back his privelages, which I said no. THAT is when I KNEW I had found a winner discipline plan! They recognize that they have to do their part to get what they want. They also realize this is something we are sticking with :)
Adjustments
The school year is off to good start, I guess. Caleb seems to be really enjoying jr high. The only problem is that he doesn't want to study. He has nagged us for several years to get him a trumpet to play and he has been looking forward to middle school so that he can start band. Well, band started but the first couple of nights we really had to fight him to practice. They were not actually playing at school yet (he just started taking his instrument yesterday and they have yet to start playing), but I knew he needed some time to get used to the fact that he HAD to practice a minimum of 30 minutes a night. He is finally to the point that he is doing it without me telling him.
He is also enjoying swim, although it is obvious that many of the kids on the team have pools and swim regularly. He is holding his own, but when he gets tired he starts swimming underwater, which he is great at. He can hold his breath a long time! Unfortunately, underwater swimming isn't really a part of it! He has finally gotten the freestyle down and he is great at the kicking of the breaststroke, they are working on the arms.
Isaac is night and day difference from last year. This time last year he was failing...more than one class. It took us half the year to figure out he had ADD and get him set with a medicine. He struggled ALL year, but never gave up and worked so hard. He even did a voluntary summer school this summer to help him catch up. He brought home his first paper packet (they only bring home school work every two weeks and we sign it and send it back) last week. He had 10 graded papers. He had one D, 2 B's and the rest were all 100's!! His hard work has REALLY paid off! We spent HOURS every night last year doing homework. He is getting it done in about 30 minutes this year!!
Bryce is making great grades, for the most part. He has been diagnosed with ADD and was put on medicine yesterday. His problems are showing more in behavior than grades. He is having a hard time with spelling and reading comprehension. He can read very well, knows his sight words, etc. His problem is that he doesnt want to take the time to do it. So he skims everything. You cannot answer all the comprehension questions correctly by skimming! As of now (and hopefully it will stay this way) he is on the same medicine Isaac is on. This medicine is only in his system for about 8 hours, so it is out of his system by the time school is out. There are no highs or lows, he doesn't "come off" the medicine (there is no obvious mood swing or any kind of down when the medicine wears off). Isaac has had no side effects (other than a "weird" feeling the very first day he took it). And, he doesn't have to take the medicine when he doesn't go to school.
Homework time is definitely less stressful than it was last year, but I am hoping that we can get Bryce to focus on his spelling and reading a little better and homework time won't be a problem at all!
He is also enjoying swim, although it is obvious that many of the kids on the team have pools and swim regularly. He is holding his own, but when he gets tired he starts swimming underwater, which he is great at. He can hold his breath a long time! Unfortunately, underwater swimming isn't really a part of it! He has finally gotten the freestyle down and he is great at the kicking of the breaststroke, they are working on the arms.
Isaac is night and day difference from last year. This time last year he was failing...more than one class. It took us half the year to figure out he had ADD and get him set with a medicine. He struggled ALL year, but never gave up and worked so hard. He even did a voluntary summer school this summer to help him catch up. He brought home his first paper packet (they only bring home school work every two weeks and we sign it and send it back) last week. He had 10 graded papers. He had one D, 2 B's and the rest were all 100's!! His hard work has REALLY paid off! We spent HOURS every night last year doing homework. He is getting it done in about 30 minutes this year!!
Bryce is making great grades, for the most part. He has been diagnosed with ADD and was put on medicine yesterday. His problems are showing more in behavior than grades. He is having a hard time with spelling and reading comprehension. He can read very well, knows his sight words, etc. His problem is that he doesnt want to take the time to do it. So he skims everything. You cannot answer all the comprehension questions correctly by skimming! As of now (and hopefully it will stay this way) he is on the same medicine Isaac is on. This medicine is only in his system for about 8 hours, so it is out of his system by the time school is out. There are no highs or lows, he doesn't "come off" the medicine (there is no obvious mood swing or any kind of down when the medicine wears off). Isaac has had no side effects (other than a "weird" feeling the very first day he took it). And, he doesn't have to take the medicine when he doesn't go to school.
Homework time is definitely less stressful than it was last year, but I am hoping that we can get Bryce to focus on his spelling and reading a little better and homework time won't be a problem at all!
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